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Showing posts from April, 2017

Resentment

I resent being born broken. Every step seems a trudge under massive weight.

"Solving The Baha'i Gay Problem"

A Baha'i society is the only thing that can solve the problem. Being raised in a sexed up culture just puts us all on the wrong feet to begin with, so our understanding is very limited. Kinsey studies found anonyously that 90 percent of men had either thought of being with or had been with another man -- another problem is the men that won't admit such. Only the sore thumbs stick out and anyone who can go with a woman does and keeps their part of the spectrum hidden, so there seems to be just "straight" and "gay" when really there's everything in between.

I just don't believe Baha'is will ever marry gay Baha'is, and I really don't think they should.

Letter to a Respondent

What follows is my warts-and-all reply to a Baha'i gentleman who shared his story with me. He had eventually married a Baha'i woman.

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Thank you for sharing your story. I am currently warring between wanting children and a family and how much I love men. The Universal House of Justice says now, basically, people can be attracted to many things they aren't supposed to have sex with. Having worked as a clinical social worker in a state hospital made for sexually violent predators, where it is currently accepted that attraction to children is a legitimate sexual attraction, as are bizarre attractions to feet, etc. and that we should not follow those.

The American argument about homosexuality is only because it is between legally consenting adults, and thus is technically legal. It will never be legal to marry a child in this country, at least, nor a sheep, etc., because the entire basis for the legal argument is two consenting adults have …

Morose

I don't celebrate my homosexuality, I hate it. I look at it as a tragic tweak, be it genetic or whatever, that separates me from a life I want. I look at it as a monumental "problem with women" that I just can't get past and my future -- I'm already damned near 45 -- looks like one round of unrequited love that shouldn't exist after another that I harbor internally and torment myself over until my life is over.

Surrogate mother? Where? And with what millions? I can't afford glasses or a new front tooth.

Straight folks shouldn't take for granted how lucky they are.

Baha'i Obligatory Prayer

As Baha'is know, we have a daily obligatory prayer we are supposed to say. We can say the short, long, or medium versions (at noon, at night, and thrice a day, respectively) using our discretion. My uncle says he'd better say the noon version or he's forced to do the long version (the medium requires a morning prayer), but I can say I'm horrible at doing any of them right now, although that hasn't always been the case. Why the choice? My personal view is that Baha'u'llah said His laws applied to the whole world -- Muslims who love the daily prayer and become Baha'is would probably actually gravitate towards the Long or Medium versions because they were raised that way, whereas Western Baha'is raised in Judeo-Christian "pray on your knees at night" households.

I've performed, and I mean performed, the Long version a couple times in my life as best I could -- it includes a lot of movements I can't do holding the book very well, and p…